Sacrifice

I cut my hair when I’m sad

An issue with a boyfriend

A friend, a problem, a feeling

Anything in between

Demands a lock of hair

For ritual killing

An offering for the cost

Of rejuvenating

And rise from

The deadly beating

After a while

It grew back and longer

But it won’t last with this anger

Again, it will be offered

To the deity of insanity

In exchange for serenity

It’s a mortal crown

That deserves an eternal frown

Long live the Queen they said

But why do we still stare

To the block of a statue

And sacrifice our virtue?

Every time I cut it

I knew I had it

This overwhelming feeling

Of a broken healing

A timeline I demand

To discover the recover

Of how will my heart begins

To wonder at love all over

But then again

We would never comprehend

Why sacrifice is legit

For a broken woman to commit

In searching for herself

Reunite with oneself

A riddle we all ponder

Forever wander this mysterious monster

Demands a hair

For an exchange

To remain center

New Norms

When distance
becomes closeness
When hands depart
becomes intimate
When Texting
becomes courting
When hugs and kisses
Wrapped up in Xs and Os
These new norms
we're evolving
will it destroy us
or render our love forever?

Quarantine Day-44

Drained

There are times when you're draining from people's judgment.
It happens a lot these days when everything you heard is not entirely the truth and everything you speculate aren't relatable.
Over the past decade, I come to realize that I have wasted my time and energy for no apparent reason. It exhausts me to a point where depression and anxiety excitedly lurking and creeping and waiting for me to fall into a deep sleep and then attack.
It benefits me nothing but shameless accusations and bad views with nonsense speculation. People would still judge you, even when you're just being a good listener. They would still accuse you; even when you didn't say a thing. People would still say that you're being brainwashed or you've picked the wrong sides, even when you're just minding your own business. People would still talk, regardless and just when it hit me; that's when I decided to stop explaining myself. I just let them do whatever makes them superior and satisfied like a sadist craving for pain. I know my stand because I only go where it makes me grow. I won't let any degrading statement takes control of me. I refused to digest on their nonsense saga and I won't budge from where I know my worth. I direct on my drama. I decide my own life. I control my own.

cleopatra

every soul
I've met
along the journey;
there's a lost Cleopatra
that once ruled their heart

The one who's barely there

The one who's barely there
Had the guts to have a say
That the role That he played
Had contributed he said
Had not he realized
Those words he lay
NoNe whats so ever
A ”sorry” had said
For neglecting his own offspring
For the sake of his pride and
His job was more important
Then spending time with them
The one who's barely there
Had the guts to say ”I’m there”
Didn’t realize the damage he caused
Since the day a womb have mould
All promises he said were bulls
He only hopes that
She would overlook
But she never forgets
The pain she had since 2015
He hasn’t realized
The sacrifice he presents
Was the reason
He wasn’t forgiven
And Still,
He had the guts to have a say
This person who’s barely there

Sometimes, Love is just not enough

I hope that one day
you have the courage
to find happiness
for yourself
and not hiding
from it ;
it doesn't matter
if it's not with me;
as long as you're happy
it'll be enough
happiness
for me

UNDO

Can you un-do?

These shattered glasses

The pieces of impossible fractions

Glued together

As you push the button

‘rewind’

Convince the larva

Is melted

Can you un-sing?

This excruciating melody

Stings in the heart

Leaving no mercy

Like slitting my wrist

Letting me die

Wither and fail

Can you un-kiss?

This haunting taste

Lingering at night

Followed with your sight

This burning tear

Dismantling my fear

Of wanting you near

Such impossible sphere