I am Fine

I am fine
don't mind me
in a few minutes
I'll be alright;
really?
is that so?
weren't you crying
under the table
when your call
wasn't answered
at all?

it's okay
it'll work out
anyway
i always kept
my pose at ease -
really?
is that so?
i thought i heard
you stomping around
holding a fist
punching the air
while
gritting your teeth

i am strong
don't pity me
i have faith -
do you really?
then why your eyes
flickering with lies
and your heart burned
gasping for air
pointing out
you're alone
with your head down
hoping for space
escapes from the lenses
you keep screaming
that you're fine
you're okay
the burden you take
when you're is taken aback
with questions
that they stated
saying that you're fake

don't hide your feelings
say what you meant
a heart meant for healing
it's not the end
it's okay
to fall and cry
it's not wrong
to punch and bawls
this heartache
this hate
will slowly fade
and turn the day
from night
we're humans
after all
incapable to fight
this heartbreak
we tend to hide

is it wrong?
to show and tell?
what this heartfelt
when love is frail?
why ashamed
to admit your gloom
when it's not yours
to blame its doom?
fine;
we're broken
but doesn't it mean
we're just human?
rather than hiding
and pretend you're gay
laughing and joking
as if you were okay?

I'm okay
don't mind me
is it really?
you're fine
completely?
just stop;
stop it
stop it
stop it stop it;
it's okay
to say you're not
we're human anyway

regardless of our fright
say it freely
say it loud
say you're greedy
you're allowed
this feeling -
this hurt;
this easing -
it will invert
when I said
i was hurt
it doesn't mean
i am dead
it just meant
i need space
from all this haze
of uncertain maze

i know
i''ll get by
from everything
that prepared me
to die
even if
you're hurt
from that person so curt;
this despair will bare
from time to time
it will care

23.3.2019

Long run

I may run out of
I Love Yous
But believe me
I'm here
for the long run
and long run
aren't easy

18.3.2019

15.3.2019

we were saddened with a tragedy
it's been written in history
That the Hate conquers the world
Little love and compassion
was not the main causation
for this nonsense revulsion
they fought for salvation
yet buried deep
with bullets and bombs
unnoticed
unexpected
unfair

you claimed your land
that it was ancient
and burst in anger
when intruder build a mansion
this land is not yours alone
this land was built for mankind
not 'animals'; but humans
and it's merely terminal
soon will fade in black
with all our sins and cracks

what a shame
that so-called
principle you uphold
that legacy you proud of
is sickening and unfortunate
that this is a belief
you grew up with
what a shame
for us to see
this is the colour
you choose
to show me

here's a prayer
for all them wrongdoers
here's a blessing
for all the tragic victims
let's unite
than upbringing fright
this tragic misery
won't cause us the blight
with love and compassion
the reason for unison
let dark history
buried deep
and grew
serenity out of it

*this heart goes to all the family of the Christchurch victims.

Awkward

Deep inside
I know
I should
Find a spot
Put a dot
Leave a gap
Keep a distance
This Instance -
For unnecessary loop
that causes us croup

15.3.2019

Finally

Finally¬¬
is just a little
too late;
you should
have known that
from our very
first sight -

19.4.2019